Questions Alzheimer's Caregivers Ask Frequently

Why do Alzheimer patients forget how to drive?

Many teenagers age thirteen and fourteen know how to drive. Yet, the states do not license them because they have not developed the judgment required at their young age. With regards to Alzheimer patients, their judgment and the complex operation issue of driving has been impaired. Remember years ago, when you first learned to drive or learned a new skill... It was often difficult at first, but after a few tries, it was a breeze? In this Early Stage of the disease, it is this memory combined with this lack of judgment that causes the patient to refrain from driving. My mom was an Alzheimer Patient. She said, "I couldn't back out of my own driveway. I got hung up in the shrubbery.and my neighbor had to come and get me out. Mom never drove again!

Why do Alzheimer patients wander?

From my extensive readings and observations, I do not believe that Alzheimer patients wander aimlessly. Fifty years ago as a young girl, I observed my great-grandfather 'on Alzheimer'. I noticed that he would always commence his trip in the right direction to reach his destination over 50 miles to the south... However, along this walk, he would get confused. Now, I believe that he generally had a destination in mind. Although the destination was clear only to him.

Alzheimer's patients confuse how to get there? They confuse the city or the location, they confuse the mileage, they confuse the directions-north, south, east and west, or the directions first, second, third, they confuse right and left. No wonder many patients give up driving, cooking, shopping and other activities- IT'S TOO CONFUSING!

Now, I understand that when you are forever confused daily, hourly, minute by minute, you will have extreme mood swings, you will become agitated and unreasonable, you may become DELUSIONAL and really have that steadfast belief that your caregiver is a thief, a robber, and an abuser. To understand Alzheimer, I realized that it is important to have a working knowledge of Delusions and Hallucinations. I understood and accepted the ideas of hallucinations-when the patient sees, hears, tastes or feels something that is not true. However, the concept of delusions-The false belief that the patient believes are real-really upset me. When my mom said, " You are being cruel to me." I was very upset and took it personally, even though all books, leaflets, and brochures on Alzheimer's caution ideal caregivers -Don't Take it Personally. Six months later as I was re-reading The 36 Hour Day, I read that exact learned phrase that many Alzheimer's patients repeat to their caregivers when they are confused, or agitated or stubborn, or unreachable, or want things done their way.

So, I playfully said to the authors, Where were you when I needed you most? My answer to caregivers, I am here when you need me most. Where were you when my mom screamed this sentence to me? Seriously though, during my five years of caring for my mom, I began to realize how Alzheimer's caregivers feel.. and of course, they will tell you loudly and clearly. More importantly, I am beginning to understand how the patient feels...They will tell you loudly but not clearly. My goal is to understand what they can not say clearly. With this brain disease, the ability to communicate goes first. So, even though they are adults, they communicate on a two- three age level at times.- at the times- at the locations where their brain cells are diseased, or tangled or twisted. So, we know about 'the terrible two's and how they physically throw, hit and kick to communicate their agitation or to express their feelings when they don't get what they want. Toddlers can be taught better responses because that section of the brain has not been completely formed. Unfortunately, Alzheimer's patients can not recover this section of the brain that is diseased, or that is malfunctioning, or that is not acting properly... So, they kick, throw, and hit to communicate their feelings especially when they do not agree with the caregiver.Or maybe, they don't understand the caregiver, or maybe, they don't understand the requests. Alzheimer's Literature suggests that caregivers make requests a game of what to do instead of what not to do? Something like 'Simon Says.'

For example, My mom would often bring in the mail and throw it to me. Sometimes, I would be taking a nap or reading and throwing the mail would startle me. So, I would say," Don't throw the mail. Well, that didn't work. Finally, I remembered one of the tips in the support group leaflet. TELL THEM WHAT TO DO instead of What not to do. So, I began saying, "Place the mail on the kitchen counter."

...and my mom never threw the mail at me again.

So, what can caregivers do?

My answer today is based on caregivers suggestions, my readings, my visits to Alzheimer's conferences, my personal experiences- being an Alzheimer caregiver for eight years- five with my mom, and especially my valuable support from the Alzheimer Support Group.

My short answer is Read, Read, Read

1. Look at Alzheimer as a disease-- as an injury make all requests simple.

Once we look at Alzheimer as an injury- an injury to the brain- we can treat it as we treat our other injuries that are slow to heal -treatable but incurable.

2. Practice calming behavior-- a calm voice.

Many times a loud voice is upsetting - but a LOUD MAD VOICE- OH NO!

3. Try introducing calming activities- music, modeling clay

4. Become interested and Listen to the patient's stories-over and over and over...

5. Divert the patient's interest or focus towards more calming conversations.

Did you notice the keyword today is CALM?

In my first article, I discussed" Understanding Alzheimer's Patients" and I emphasized that ATTITUDE IS THE KEY.

..."Attitude will make or break a company,..a church...a home."

Once we enter the patient's home, our attitude takes center focus. Alzheimer's patients may be confused and forgetful, but they are smart. They feel that calming personality and they tend to cooperate with that calm, loving person who is their caregiver.

..." The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.

Annie Kate Gaskins Laws
Exposing Alzheimer's

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Original article